So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
