Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
