So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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