So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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