When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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