It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
