you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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