And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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