omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
