Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
