You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize