her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize