i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
True strength comes from lack of pants
is that a dick in a sweater?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
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