I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
