Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
