nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
