So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
