She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
