wanna go halves on a baby?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
