East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
