new low.... made out with someone while peeing
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
