im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
actually, I'm a sock model
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I believe in your delicious
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I forgot wine drunk hurts
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
