Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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