if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
