I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
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