ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
