I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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