im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
