yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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