No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
