we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize
