is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
