I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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