He is an equal opportunity slut.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize