youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
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