Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
