There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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