we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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