Sponge bath it is.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
