We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
