I wish I could punch you in the face.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
