I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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