yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
