I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
