i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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