i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize