I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
