the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
