I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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