Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize