If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Randomize
