If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
